June 3 Review Dangerous LIaisons

  In the spirit that inspires this blog, I visited one of the events from the past weekend. I give Ottawa Little Theatre’s Dangerous Liaisons eight out of 10 pantaloons and the crew at Ottawa Little Theatre 11 out of 10 discounted Keith’s.

   Saturday night was Dan’s birthday party at James Street Pub. It was a great time; there was karaoke, friends filling up one whole side of the restaurant, and some girl I met in the bathroom who was awesome.

    Weeks ago, a school chum invited the boyfriend and me to come see the dress rehearsal for a play on Sunday that she and the hub would be stage-handling during its season. She reserved two seats for us.

  We were on our best behaviour at Dan’s party in anticipation of sitting quietly in front of live acting for a couple of hours on Sunday.

   We continued to be on our best behaviour until 3 a.m. and even while the bar emptied out.

   When I sprang out of bed at noon the next day, my play-companion was a covers-hogging pseudo-corpse and in no condition to come to the thee-ah-taw.

   I dialed my most sympathetic friends to help me fill Elliott’s seat:

    My next attempt I thought for sure was a long shot.

    I texted the birthday boy. The night after his big birthday party. Where he rocked a sweet karaoke rendition of the classic song “Sit On My Face”.

    Theatre-folk, indeed.

   Dan, in probably an act of extreme pity or continued drunkenness, said he would meet me (he later revealed that when I said Glenn Close starred in the movie he assumed I meant Fatal Attraction... not the same but would make an awesome play).

   We respectively rushed to the theatre. I arrived slightly before Dan did looking like this:

and stupid Dan showed up showered, styled, and in clean clothes. Which was dickish.

   We made it just on time and fumbled our way to our seats.

   There’s something about being in a setting where it’s polite to be quiet that makes my limbs all movey. My lips suddenly get really chapped and I have to find my chapstick. Or my mouth will be all dry and my gum is at the bottom of my purse underneath my hangover potato chips.

   The play, however, was awesome. There were some make-out scenes that I think ran a little long. I don’t go for that sort of lewd public display.

   The actors were so enthusiastic and their costumes were fantastic. Everyone on the cast is ridiculously good looking.

You'll notice that the choice of music is a little off. Violinist Marti Bueno opened the play (awesomely) and did a wicked job of setting the tone for a period piece. However, between scenes they played Adele. Her album is full of scorned-lover work which one might think would work in such a passionate story but the poppy, 21st century sound really made it hard to stay and believe in the story.

   We were about 10 minutes in when I realised that I recognised the story; I guess Cruel Intentions is based on Dangerous Liaisons. It made it easier to follow along once I realised.

Marquise De Merteuil is Catherine and Vicomte De Valmont is Sebastian.

HOWEVER

I now know there is only one way to portray a proper traitorous cad:

   I don’t know how we’ve lived in a modern world so long without pantaloons. They offer the perfect combination of poofy comfort around the thighs and major aerodynamic action in the calf-department.

   Because we weren’t at the official show, I got a sneak peek into the after-show party that the crew and actors attend. The people who work in Ottawa Little Theatre are some of the hardest working people I’ve met.

No one is paid to be there but they all move like they are. I feel like I was allowed a little glimpse of a bigger community made out of kick ass.

Please go see Dangerous Liaisons. And then go see whatever they put on next.

It's important to support local theatre.

They have a bar.

June 5 to June 23. Ottawa Little Theatre, 400 King Edward Avenue. $25.00 (Beer $5.00) 613-233-8948. www.ottawalittletheatre.com