The Psychic, Mystic and Seer Expo at
the labyrinthian Nepean Sportsplex (NPS) was everything I thought it
would be plus fifty dollars.
As you move through life you're going
to meet someone who has genuinely been touched by a psychic and hopefully not physically. They have a relative who's had
predictions eerily come true, creepy feelings when exploring past
lives, and one lady I know wouldn't let her son ride a motorcycle
until he was 25 because a psychic said so (...Mother).
I don't think any
of those things happened at the Psychic, Mystic and Seer Expo.
This could
totally be by fault of my own.
Maybe they could sense my scepticism and my interest in only their
jewellery. Maybe my vibes were filthy that day.
Maybe I'm just a
Nervous Nelly — if they can see into my future can they see into my
past? Do they know about that time I fell over while drunk-peeing?
 |
| oh, god. I hope nobody
psychically recalls this later. |
Maybe
it was that most readings cost an average of $70.00, I don't know.
The admission turned out to be ten
dollars (which also included a chance to win their raffle). There
were probably 15 vendors in all.
Dan came with me. He's had a brush with a legit' mystic experience but
wasn't feeling super confident about the folks at the NSP either.
After wandering around for a bit we
finally saw access to our future that we could afford — a $20
Spiritual Presentation of Enlightenment. See,
all you have to do is write down your first and last name, your
mother's maiden name, and your date of birth. Then mystics at work
print out seven pages of your possible future life, your aura colour,
the name of your guardian angel, your spiritual stone, and etcetera
while you browse the exposition for three to five minutes.
 |
| mysteries of the oracle.... |
When
we came back around, the seer held out my report to me:
Lady:
“What do you do for a living?”
Me: “Uh, I'm... umm... I'm a
writer?”
Lady:
“Gasp! Read your first line.”
Me:
“Spiritually,
you were born with the soul of an artist.”
Lady:
nods knowingly.
Also,
my guardian angel is the
Archangel
Michael. Suck on that, lesser-people-with-lesser-guardians.
Dan
had a little bit different of an interaction:
Lady:
“What do you
do for a living?”
Dan:
“I'm in retail.”
Lady:
visibly recoiling, “What do you want
to do?”
Dan:
“I don't know.”
Lady:
“Dan, you are not done. You are not done your journey. Keep going.”
Dan:
...prolonged and sarcastic silence.
As we read through the rest we came across an incredibly eerie prediction in Dan's report:
Your actions may or may not change
the course of your future.
God speed, Dan.
